Drinkins

Yo. I has bin away for long time man, long time. I has noticed fings dat has bin goins on an I iz not happy wiv all the shit that be takin place in da world today.

I will gis you an exarmple.

Kev's Guides:

Rapping (An I don’t mean non of dat chrismas present shit)

No you all who no me no dat ah like a bit of da riddum an da rhime. Me an me mate Dave are amateur rap artists, an we call ourselves ‘Blingin Bints’.

Kev's Guides:

Trading on The Stock Market

In dis world we iz livin in today, you can buy bitz of peeples biznizzez, not da bricks or enifin like dat ya no, i means in da form of dese sharez.

Kev's Guides:

Speaking Spanish

Spanish iz da phattist language the world got goin on. Mainly because Ibiza is a Spanish city ya know. I has been there loadsa time and it iz wicked.

Kev's Guides:

Clay Pigeon Shooting

Now dis is a really bitchin sport you know, they does it at tha Olympiks. What you’s gonna need is a fat ass rifle, and sum of these clay birds. I’m gonna be usin mah BB gun and me mam’s crockery.

Kev's Guides:

Feeding Ducks 'n shi'

Now, I likes nothing better then getting on a one to one wiv mother nature, after all, she iz a bird, and shes probably got tits. Now, in mah local park, as well as burnt out Ford Fiestas, we has also got a duck pond, full of ducks.